how can I be me?

In these days, I'm thinking about myself all the time. What is it me, and how can I be me, and what makes me be me, so on!? I'm working at airspresso in QT airport as a comiss chef, but in fact, I'm making sandwich, doing dishes and, sorting rush bins, etc. I was thinking it isn't worth thing to do, because, first time I got there I was expected to be able to handle by chef's order. But I wasn't be able to do that well, so they figured out how to handle me to do and what suit me to do. So, I disappointed them, and I was disappointed by them as well, because, when the time is passed for a while I will get used to do it and be able to do it as they ordered to me something. But, I didn't do my best, things are getting worse, I couldn't help me to keep to do it like doing dishes things. But, everything that I did so far was my mistake at all. I should do my best and didn't have to show them awkward face. I can not go back where I started from. So, I'm finishing my work this Sunday.

I was so selfish. I saw that I wanted to see almost all the time during the time at work. But now I can see a bit of the other side of work. Most of them are really hard workers and really proud of by themselves and, I should respect them what they are. It doesn't matter what you are doing or where you belong to. If you really like it, want to do, and mostly like them who you are work with then go for it.

But this place is not for me at the time, I didn't get there for being hard worker or good worker but expected something from the work like improving English, free meal, good colleagues and, wages, without preparing anything for it, just wanted to get. or... maybe not. Anyway, want to keep going for my goal. Thx.